Totally Total Divas: Bad News Bryan and Roadside Rumble

The Divas continue to bring the drama to the small screen every week.  How am I supposed to keep up with these crazy cats?  Obviously I was super busy last week so I didn’t have time to write about last week’s episode (by super busy, I mean I was honing my procrastination skills).  That being said, I’m just going to lump last week’s and this week’s episode into one blog post.  Cool?  Cool.

If it’s not cool with you, I’m going to go Nattie on yo ass.

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Totally Total Divas: Eggs Over Freezing

The second episode of Total Divas Season 3 premieres tonight, so what better time to dissect the first episode?  Here’s a refresher so you are up to speed before tuning in tonight.

My reaction to the season premiere of Total Divas matches Mr. Cena's.
My reaction to the season premiere of Total Divas matches Mr. Cena’s.

But first, what’s up with that episode title?  Is it supposed to sound like eggs over easy?  Nice try at being clever, E! Network, but that title is a stretch for even your college-educated viewers like me.  (It probably isn’t but I am trying to make myself feel better for not understanding the play on words right away.)

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“Total Divas” Returns so Let’s Dissect This Season’s Trailer

I know I am way behind on posting this.  Like, WAY behind.  This trailer was posted one month ago for crying out loud!  But what can I say, it’s #SummerTime (lol get it?!) so I was enjoying the outdoors before winter swoops in and keeps me as a hostage in my apartment once again.  Now that the Divas are making their return to the small screen, I have a reason to blog again.  JK, I had tons of reasons to blog.  I was just lazy and didn’t pursue any of them.

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Totally Total Divas: The Braniel Bus

Before we even dive into this week’s recap of Total Divas, let’s give some props to the E! Network for the name of this episode.  Such clever!  The Braniel Bus?!  lololololz

Okay, now that that’s over, let’s recap how Arianne is a bully, Eva Marie is a victim, and Nikki is a hillbilly.

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Totally Total Divas: Always a Bridesmaid

Total Divas returned this past Sunday and it did not disappoint!  Wait, I retract that; some parts were fairly boring but hey, that sneak peek of the season looked amazeballs, didn’t it?!  And whatta way to end the first episode – with a cliffhanger!  Actually, it’s pretty fortunate I waited until today to write this review as I have been stalking Nikki Bella’s Instagram since Sunday and – lo and behold – she posted quite the giveaway photo today.  But we’ll get to that later.  Let’s tear this episode up, shall we?

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Throwback Thursday: Hogan Knows Best

As you may or may not know, AKA in news you probably do not care about, Hulk Hogan returned to the WWE on Monday during Raw in Green Bay.  Da “Frozen Tundra,” dontcha know?!  Cheeseheads across the stadium freaked da shit out (but did not spill their beers) to see the Hulkster in all his glory.  hoganhogan2

(My partly-dead wrestler/lover, the Undertaker, also returned and I was insanely jelly of everyone in the audience, but this isn’t pertinent to the story.  I just wanted to mention how awesome the Undertaker is.)

*swoon*
*swoon*

The following night, WWE was in Milwaukee to tape Smackdown, which is also a popular show the WWE has.  Let me emphasize that this show is popular and people watch it.  Why do I emphasize that?  Because every time WWE comes to Milwaukee, the show is … uhh … suckish.  It’s not totally sucky because some cool things happen sometimes, but also it’s nowhere near as good as shows in other cities.

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Total Teaserz and Why My Love for Total Divas is Totally Rational

OMG ya’ll – Total Divas returns in March!  Raise yo hand if you can’t wait for these sassy sexcakes to return to your television screen.

(I’d raise my hand but it’s too difficult to type with just one hand.)

For those of you that didn’t raise your hand, hear me out.  Don’t give me any BS about how you don’t like drama and you don’t want to support these “trashy” ladies by watching their show.  Uhh do you watch any TV?  It’s all drama, even the news (insert conspiracy theory here about how the media distorts the news for us laypeople).  At least with the Divas, you’ll know what you’re watching is real.  Well, besides their boobs and hair.

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